I just lost 2 and a half hours of my life trying to make sense of Microsoft Store. In the end, I gave up because, as always, you can put lipstick on a pig but it is still a pig!

So, at around 11am this morning I decide to log in the Microsoft store to purchase a game.

It asks me for my email, so I do input my email and the text box confirm that there is no account under that email..

Would you like us to register a new account using %$#%#^@gmail.com?

I say yes..

The email %$#%#^@gmail.com is already in use. Would you like to register a new account?

I say yes..

I Input my email again “%$#%#^@gmail.com”

Sorry there is no registered account under that email. Would you like to register a new account?

I say yes..

Would you like to register a new account using %$#%#^@gmail.com?

I say yes..

The email %$#%#^@gmail.com is already in use. Would you like to register a new account?

Here I did a big mistake and accidentally said Yes again.. And so the game began again..

By now 30 minutes have passed, and for some unknown reason Microsoft has finally decided to accept my email %$#%#^@gmail.com. Now we get to the password..

I input my password and you guess it.. The password is now wrong..

Would you like to setup a new password for your account?

I say Yes..

Please enter your email address

Oh Jesus.. So I re-re-re-re-re enter the email address %$#%#^@gmail.com.

Please confirm the code we have sent to %$#%#^@gmail.com

Checking the junk mail and it sure is, I can see an email with a 4 digit code. I Copied and paste it in the new Microsoft store window..

Please select a new password

I select my old password ****** and reconfirm it in the next slot below…

A code has been sent to confirm your new password

By now I kind of lost interest in actually buying the game but for the sake of the exercise I check again in my junk folder and there it is.. A 6 digit code this time.. So back to Microsoft I enter the 6 digit code and…

We have seen this password too many times! Please chose a password at least 8 character long..

I thought coffee was so original.. So I do enter a new 8 characters long password…

Please confirm the code for your new password

Now is the time I wish I had a gun and a Microsoft representative right in front of me. So, once again check the junk folder copy and paste the new 6 digit code and…

Please use a password that include characters and symbols at least 8 digits long

So for fun I typed Microsoftstoreisapileofshite123 for password..

Please confirm the code for your new password

I don’t think I’m going to make it alive, out of this loop.. I enter the code and you guess it..

Don’t use common words for a password. Please select a password of 8 characters at least including digits

Did I break Microsoft Store???

Apparently not. Judging by the thousand daily complaints that you can read online, this is the standard..

But wait, there is more..

I pick another password (well actually Microsoft did pick a password for me) and after another confirmation email asking if it was really me accessing my account, and asking me to type the letter in the screen (1980 style of reCaptcha) 5 times because they were simply unreadable, I got in.. 😛

What did I come here for? Oh yes, an hour and a half ago I wanted to purchase a game.. So I find the game and click the buy button.

You are not gonna believe, but Microsoft is asking me to login AGAIN. And so I did.. Email again, password again and we are back. Now is asking which form of payment I would like to use. I select Paypal, get taken to Paypal click complete. Payment accepted, get sent back to Microsoft Store and poof..

We couldn’t process your payment please call 1800 267 785

Say WHAT?? I couldn’t believe but because I hadn’t receive Paypal email confirmation of the payment, you guess it, I gave it another go. Click buy on the game page, get taken to Paypal where I get the message that there is already a purchase for Microsoft of the same nature. So I decline and this time I get taken back to Microsoft where I get asked for the address details..

I want to see the end of the tunnel, so I start to type and answer all the other stupid pathetic and rhetorical question I was getting asked by Microsoft (considering that they already have my details on my account and the confirmation address from Paypal), only to see again a familiar little window..

We couldn’t process your payment please call 1800 267 785

Guess what? Oh yes, I did. Calling the 1800 number, option 2 (where the feck is my software, option) and finally a gentleman with an unbelievable strong American accent (kind of Texas, and in a very low tone) ask me for the error number.. So very quickly I reply: “The error number is: https://www.microsoft.com/en-au” That did take few seconds to register but after 10 minutes of going around in circles, he tells me that they don’t take Paypal payments.. Really? Did I just dream the past two hours?

I thought for a moment and then realised that, I do have a life and that having to put up with all this nonsense just to buy a game, is simply not worth it. I said “Thank you sir for making it easier for me.. Good bye”

I will keep the 7 emails I got, and perhaps one day put them on a frame for my grandchildren to enjoy.. Probably they will think it was me or my Windows 10 computer.. 😲

I just wanted people to know, just in case you are thinking of using Microsoft Store and you are not sitting down or have a day off.. Apparently it is a much easier exercise if you try to purchase something using your Windows mobile phone..

Now, I do have a Microsoft purchase order number, but I really don’t know what to do with it. Logging in is too dangerous..

Put it in the bin? Hell yeah!